We could’ve called this section “Mushroom Tee” or “Spore-Couture”. But we didn’t. Because we’re grown-ups. Grown-ups with jobs. Yes, we’re mildly mycologically obsessed and wear embroidered mushrooms on our chests, but we’re still technically adults (also, we’re saving the truly awful puns for later, when you people have already bought the shirts and caps and it’s too late to throw them away and claim not to know us).
So here we are. A place for fungi you can’t eat, but you can absolutely wear - and should. Mushrooms are cool.
Available mushroom tees
We don’t have too many of them at the minute (turns out producing high-quality embroidered mushroom shirts takes a bit longer than bashing out another “graphic tee” with an ironic slogan - which is both sad, and also further evidence for our partners to prove that we really don’t think this stuff through). What we do have, however, are proper mushrooms: rare, weird, occasionally horrifying, always conversation-starting.
From embroidered recreations of illustrations from the legendary Geoffrey Kibby (yes, permission granted, no copyright demons here) to designs we’ve commissioned from actually talented individuals (look, we would have tried to develop proper skills, maybe even gotten a proper job, but we’re arts graduates, and not even one of those useful arts, word stuff - we’d do anything to be able to draw a picture or make a table) all in full colour.
When you’re wearing one of our shirts, you’re not just wearing a mushroom tee. You’re wearing an arcane little slice of mushroomery from people who, despite being all but useless in all other regards, actually care about the product and the hobby it represents.
Specifications (or “why these shirts won’t fall apart after two washes”)
All of the shirts we sell are made to order, so the delivery takes a bit longer to get to you than it probably could do or that would be ideal. That being said, they also boast the following specifications (they don’t half boast, you can barely shut them up):
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100% organic cotton – soft, breathable, and not secretly plastic.
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Medium-heavyweight (220gsm) – basically the opposite of “fast fashion tissue paper” (also, it takes us a bit to get them to you - so please bear in mind we’re serious about slow fashion.
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Full-colour embroidery – stitched to outlast your current favourite TV series (yeah, we went there, but we’re also still sad about Firefly, because old).
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Unisex cut – it’s a guy fit, so you’ll need to take into account that, as a woman, you’ll need to leave yourself some wiggle-room, but we’re not making it with any gender in mind.
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Sizes S–4XL – mushrooms and man (in the genus sense, because alliteration is important) come in all shapes and sizes.
We’ll be adding more designs as we go - the rare, the notorious, and the outright weird. Because, if you wanted a basic mushroom tee, you’d be on Etsy right now. This is for the people who want conversation pieces. The people who know their Entoloma from their Amanita. The people who, when asked “what’s on your shirt?”, want to be able to nonchalantly reply: “Oh, this? Just a carrion-scented stinkhorn from the New Forest.”
